To improve your child’s intrinsic motivation, help them set learning / mastery goals.
These goals place more emphasis on progress along the way and allow children to have lots of small wins on the way to their bigger goals.
This helps to keep them intrinsically engaged instead of placing all the emphasis on the end result. Think IMPROVE vs. PROVE. We don’t get to jump from step one to 100. We must make small improvements along the way to get to our goals. Often the big performance goal is overwhelming on its own. If we can find joy and engagement in each step, we are practicing our intrinsic motivation.
Sometimes effort and hard work gets a bad reputation. We are prone to thinking that if we have to work hard at a particular task or activity, we’re not ‘good’ at the activity. We assume that effortless mastery is the ideal situation.
However, mastery of whatever we love in life tends to come from investing lots of effort over time. The happiest people find joy in the effort of working towards something.
Try to pay attention to everything that’s happening with your child. Notice the things that you can see they’re working hard at. This will help them to see effort as a positive thing and help them to invest in the process (not just the outcome!).